Okay, so upfront I’m going to confess that I stole this from CowGal. It was simply too damn good to let it pass.
Following, are the 13 books I would buy if they had ever been written and were available.
- How to Win friends and Influence People to Give You Their Money (And anything else of value.)
- I’m Okay, You’re Okay – But, I’m More Okay Than You (Self esteem is very important.)
- The Gay Adventures of Barney the Purple Dragon (Come on, we all know he’s getting his freak on)
- The Baskins Robbins (31 flavors) Diet (It would have to come with a funhouse mirror though)
- How to Get Your Atlas to Shrug (My atlas refuses to do anything but lie there.)
- How to Turn Your Piggy Room Mate Into a Cleaning Zombie (Who wouldn’t want that?)
- Take This Job and Shove it Up Your Ass and Give Me a Nice Severance Package While You’re At It. (Don’t we all dream of this?)
- The Secret Sex Life of Big Bird (Hey, he spent his life with somebody’s hand up his butt, he must have some kinky secrets, right?)
- Al Gore: The Global Years (He is really starting to look global, doncha think?)
- Fear of Flying in the Center Row (Nobody is that thin!)
- How to Get Rich by Being You (I never said I wasn’t lazy.)
- Sex in the City and the Country and Overseas and in the Bathtub (I don’t see any reason to restrict it to the city.)
- Horny Christmas Games (It just sounds fun, doesn’t it?)