Doom and Gloom for 2009…

I have to admit that I haven’t really been keeping up with current affairs lately. I think I got such a sour taste in my mouth over the election and the snoozefest candidates that I just put on my blinders and haven’t really taken them off since.

However, recently I thought I would see what was going on in the world at large and how things were going. Yikes, not so good from what I gather. Apparently evil Israel is perpetrating bad deeds against the poor Palestinians again (hey a little war never hurt anyone, right?) and of course I didn’t need to read anything to notice that gas prices have come back into affordable range again – although I think I saw somewhere that oil was in the $30-$40 a barrel range now. Those poor day traders and futures speculators must be the ones that all the newspapers are worried about losing their jobs, huh?

And the bailouts, apparently, are still rolling out – I’m just waiting to see Writer Chick and friends on the list in my daily paper. No word yet, but I’m sure it’s coming – Zelda too is waiting with baited breath. We both sure could use our bailout money too – and it’s way less than the mortgage and auto industries are getting so you’d think the check would be cut sooner, wouldn’t you?

Our new soon-to-be Prez has been selecting his cabinet members and aside from Hillary becoming the Secretary of State (are you fricking kidding me? she’s the most diplomatic democrat around these days? yikes!) the usual suspects are all lining up and fighting over offices with a view in the West Wing. Does make one wonder though if maybe there were some ‘arrangements’ made before hand, you know? Like, ‘we get you in and then you bring us back in, right?’ know what I mean?

As to the doom and gloom, well I have to say that there are an amazing number of articles, columns and editorials discussing our not so eventual demise here in the U.S. Apparently we are to start the beginning of the end somewhere after the first month of the new administration’s takeover. A depression worse than the one that nearly destroyed the country in 1929, civil unrest and war, and to top it all off, the rest of the world will just be divying up America in digestible bits ( more on that one later) to any interloper with a b.b. gun and halloween mask. The unemployment rate will skyrocket to 25% and we’ll need a wheel barrow just to carry the worthless dollars it will take to buy a loaf of Wonder Bread. Bummer.

I guess business start ups will be at an all time low, don’t you think? I wonder though – if that happens, will there still be an internet with get rich quick schemes and free porn? How about reality shows? One called, Depression, perhaps. Although that could be confusing since people might think it was just about an unhappy fellow on psych drugs… How about Starbux? Will we go back to the nickel cup of joe and maybe the designer coffee will go for an outrageous 25 cents? Sam’s Club, Costco, Home Depot, Lowe’s? Or will most of us just be roaming the countryside in our hybrid converted SUV’s looking for work picking fruits and vegetables? Or fighting outside the gated landfills trying to get to the recyclables waiting there for any smart depression era entreprenuer to take advantage of? Seriously, what would a modern day depression look like folks, have you ever pondered it? Apparently, the newspaper folks are and many other concerned citizens, what about you? What do you think it would look like?