Is a funny animal – at least to me. In examining it recently I see that I have always regarded it with a wary eye. A bit of distrust and dread. I can’t say why because I don’t know – but I suspect it has to do with failure.
I have gone along in life with a set of goals, some of which reach back to childhood. Some are simple, some are challenging, but most of them are unattained. At least not to the level I want. In my mind, I have looked upon this as failure, which in turn has made me feel that I’m a failure. Whether that is true or not is beside the point because it is my belief alone that it is failure that makes it so. If I were to follow this as logic then it would follow that if I changed my mind, that I wouldn’t be a failure. Does that make sense? It does to me.
I have come to realize that we are what we believe, what we think because by the very process of believing and thinking things we bring them about. If you read any biography of any successful or famous person you’ll notice that belief was paramount in the events of their life. That often, the singular action of believing in their goals and their ability to reach the goal was all that stood between them and failure.
I think now that many of the things that have happened in my life recently had to do with what I thought and I had more influence over the events than I knew. Simply because today I think differently and life is different. I realized the other night, while sitting on the back steps and looking up at the sky that I was thinking about the future and I wasn’t cringing or dreading it. I was looking forward to it. The change of attitude was a shock to me and it made me look back over the last few months with wonder.
I couldn’t tell you what brought about my change in view – just that a change has indeed occurred. I look now upon the future with anticipation and smiles. All of the trials and travails that have led me here were part of the journey I think. What I believed to be failures were only part of the process and will continue to be.
I’m sure I will still have dark days and frustration and wonder if the effort is worth it. However, I know it will pass and my optimism will win again. And that’s how I prefer it. I like to feel hopeful and cheerful about the possibilities. I like to think that things do indeed work themselves out and that I can attain the goals I’ve set for myself and new ones that may pop up. So I choose to be cheerful and hopeful and by so choosing the future looks bright.