And Now a Word About Perspective…


All of you know of my friend Kelly who had a very bad car accident about a year ago. I have written many posts about it and all of you have uttered prayers and good wishes for her over these many months. You know how very much she means to me and how very much I admire her and love her.

Today, she posted a message to her CarePages page to all her friends and family and I wanted to share it with you for a couple of reasons:

1. I wanted you to hear first hand from Kelly and her view of what happened to her
2. I wanted you to have the opportunity to experience the change of perspective I did when I read her message.

Kelly said:

Why My Accident Was A Good Thing

Me again!

Almost getting killed a good thing? Excuse me? What the heck am I talking about?

Yes, it’s been exactly one year today that my life got totally turned inside out. It’s been a year of misery. A year of “crybaby days” where literally all I can do almost daily is cry about how much I hate what my life has turned into. This one year anniversary has been looming and all I’ve been able to think about is the frustration with how far I still have to go to get my life back. I mean gosh, broken bones heal so much faster than broken brains. I can’t tell you how frustrating it is to still be where I am.

OK, there you go. You’ve got the miserable side of it. It’s all I’ve been thinking about lately. Just what do I say on the actual one year anniversary day?

Well grab a cup of coffee because I’ve got so much more to say. I started to think. What IF this accident never happened? I started to realize the amount of GOOD things that I’d be without or that wouldn’t have happened. When it comes right down to it, everything I’ve had to “endure” is actually a small price to pay for all the good that has come of it.

Good things? Am I serious?

Yes, I am. Here is the short list:

#1 I’ve met and can introduce all of you to amazing people that can change your life. If only one of you gets some part of your life improved, worth it.

From the most awesome Physical Therapist around:
Bret from Physiocare in Woodinville. 425-402-9443 (read the message he left on my last/first update. Wouldn’t you want that attitude guiding you?) Plus you wouldn’t believe what I’ve been able to accomplish with his instruction/guidance. He could do the same for you!
To the very funny AND inspirational friend:
Al Foxx – Professional motivational speaker/comedian/author. Someone who’s had the same injury as me. HE can make jokes about it! To have someone understand to the degree that he does and can make me laugh so stinking much has been unbelievable. The fact that he’s become a friend of mine I get to have a part in helping others experience his awesome wise words and comedy. To have him inspire even one of you, again, way cool! (you all get a copy of his book if you can make it to the anniversary party 😉
To the most tremendous group of friends:
All of you. You wouldn’t believe how awesome you all have been. To have such a remarkable community surrounding you is amazing. If what happened to me created in any way more of a “come together” attitude that has inspired any more of a community feeling…. so worth it. I have heard of some amazing things that you have done for others. And to “inspire” anyone to be a good friend to anyone else is so, so way cool!

#2 Revitalized marriages. Not only has this accident made Mark and I even more committed to each other (we’re going to renew our vows! 😉 We have heard of other marriages being more “solidified”. If even one spouse changes their viewpoint to one of “So what if the dishes didn’t get done today. I’m so glad I still have a teammate for life”. Oh my gosh! So cool!!

#3 The totally awesome talent my brother, Stuart, has with the written word has been exposed. So many have been wowed with the way he speaks I can add that to my list. I 100% know he will be get to do so much good with how he writes. I’ll get to say “he got his start with me!”

#4 Lives SAVED! Yes my accident has saved lives. How? you ask? Well, look at it this way. IF the driver of the car that hit me had hit anyone else, they would have been killed. The fact that it was me and I had the support system there to help me survive and the motivation there to hang on, I DID. Someone else might not have had what was needed to live. I did, so someone else lived. Not only that but so many have changed their driving habits as a result of my accident, how many other accidents have been prevented?
AND The guy that hit me has changed HIS driving habits!! Yes, we have talked! I called him because I heard from our attorney that he was willing to speak with me in front of drivers Ed classes encouraging kids just learning how to drive to be very careful on the road. Is that cool or what? I had a very long conversation with him and was totally impressed with his willingness to talk with me. Yes, I did hate him at first and yes I did want him to suffer some big consequences. BUT then my mother genes kicked in and I realized I couldn’t have another life harmed in any way by my accident. So I got my courage up and called him. I know it took guts on his side too and it was an awesome conversation. He is a kid just starting to get his life going and talking to him made me realize he really IS a good kid. This was an accident. He admitted to me his driving habits have totally changed as a result of the accident. AND he is very willing to work with me to make sure this doesn’t happen to someone else. That has saved lives and will save more. Period.

So here is something else I want to say about the guy that hit me: I need all of you to forgive him too. Worrying about me and Clara (the girl in the accident with me) has had him totally beside himself. I honestly felt that from him. Having anger from others hanging over him is NOT something I want him to have to live with. Plus he’s willing to help me prevent this from happening to anyone else. I don’t think I could asked for a more awesome result 😉 Let your anger with him go. He is changing his life and will change the lives of others too. Let him.

OK, OK, I promised a “short list” I know your coffee is getting low so I’ll let you go. The list continues so you’ll get more later. Gotta go celebrate.

Totally love all of you!

Kelly honey, you are amazing and you totally rawk.

8 thoughts on “And Now a Word About Perspective…

  1. Thank you! You are such an awesome friend! So totally have to include all of your friends here on my list of amazing friends. They have to know how much their thoughts, prayers, and well wishes have helped me. THANK YOU everyone!! You helped me to get to where I am today.

    Nothing to thank me for, my dear. You’re the awesome one. You really are.



  2. It can be hard for us to understand our perspective on things.
    I look at what my Sister endured the sudden loss of a child at 12 years of age that was never ill one day, and lost without any reason to be ever found. My good friends Peg and Bill who in 3 months time lost a Brother-in-Law (who was a friend of mine also). 3 months later the loss of their daughter in a car accident, 3months later Bill falls from a roof over a porch breaks both arms and both legs. And 6 months after that his sons home burns to the ground. Being around them all has taught me that your perspective is all the way you cognitavely see things and find a way to not see the negative but see things differently and
    gain strength from the experience and grow from them. One door may have closed, but another one opens that holds many good things…

    Gerry´s last blog post..Is this Our Future National Anthem

    Hey Ger,
    You’ve said it well – all true. And yes, if we aren’t looking for the open doors, we never see what is there.


  3. You are a celebration of life! I love what you have written here and how grateful you are for all the good that has come from this accident. Everything happens for a reason, you have learned many lessons and you continue to learn and grow. It is often difficult to see and understand the “why’s”, you have done a great job at stepping outside of yourself to become the observer and to understand there is so much more to this than one could initially see. Your forgiveness of the driver is one of the greatest gifts you could have given yourself and him. I feel blessed today to have been able to read what you have shared. Thank-you!

    Hey Mark,
    I’ve told Kelly to feel free to respond to you or anyone else who speaks to her directly. She may feel a little shy to do so. But like you, I feel blessed to have experienced this.


  4. What an incredible revelation, and a new found lease on life!

    I agree it’s difficult to forgive/forget and taking the time/effort to step into the other drivers’ shoes and begin to understand how difficult that also has been for him…

    Kudos to you Kelly – and to Annie and gang who’s been praying for you.


    Daisy´s last blog post..Daisy needs her space

    Hey Daisy!
    Good to see you here. Yup, kudos to one and all who have shared in this prayer-in and proven what the spirit can do. And no one is better proof than Kelly.

    Annie 🙂


  5. Hi Annie, Hi Kelly.

    I wrote a comment here this morning but pressed the wrong button at the bottom, I somehow pressed the one with the love heart – comment love.

    The Power of Prayer wow !

    Kelly Hi, You don’t know me, I’m Diane and I prayed for you. I read Annies first post about you a little while after she had written it and was so touched and so worried for you both. I know how much Annie loves you and you kinda hurt for your friends when their friends are hurting don’t you. Hurting Um ! Thats a bit of an understatment isn’t.

    I loved the picture that Annie put to that post off you and the kids and your all smiling, so beautiful. I have it in my mind now. I can see you. Its funny isn’t it.

    I was at a festival last year and I met a woman and she must have had a look of you Ha ! ‘funny as I don’t even know you’ and the picture of you and the kids instantly came into my mind. – so unexpected – so I prayed for you again, then I prayed for you again. It was so lovely to pray for you at one of our festivals of love here in the UK.

    Annie told me something about a prayer ring that I didn’t quiet understand – still don’t really but I kinda just KNEW I had to pray.

    I guess everybody that knows you and everybody that doesn’t know you just KNEW they had to pray for you.

    Aww !!

    You are so positive and alive and like you I understand that forgivness is one of the greatest gifts we have. Keep on living Kelly. I think your an angel arn’t you, a real angel in green. You look great, absoutly shinning. Your an inspiration to us all and if we could just take a leaf out of your book this world would be a more beautiful place to be. I’m in awe of your aliveness. Love Diane.

    Annieo. Wow ! Thank you so much for posting Kellys prespective, it gave me the oppurtunity to just have a little word with her. Awww! I love your friendship. I remember you said something that stuck in my mind. You said something like ‘ You might have to find a different way to manage your friendship if Kelly didn’t get better’ just that but that really touched me.

    Annieo sorry for writing best part of a page here. Big love to you both
    Love Di. x

    Hey Di,
    You know you’re more than welcome to write as long a comment as you wish – always. I thought you especially would delight in this news and Kelly’s words and I was right. She is an amazing girl – you would love her if you met her. She’s my hero.



  6. Just that Kelly can take the positive out of this ordeal really shows what kind of a remarkable woman she is. And, the ability to forgive. Forgiveness is hard in general, it’s something that I am struggling with but when you see what she has forgiven and overcome — makes all my little situations seem like nothing. I’m glad she’s healing; her body and mind. This is a miracle!

    Hey Bella,
    You’re right, it is a miracle, huh? 🙂


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