I don’t know about you but I was a die-hard Friends fan for years. In fact, even after it went off the air I watched the reruns for years. I really loved that show. There was one show in particular I remember where the girls were reading this book about how women were taken for granted and how they were the wind makers but that men were the wind stealers. It was pretty ridiculous and made for a good laugh, but the truth is, there really are wind stealers out there. But gender has nothing to do with it.
Wind stealers, life suckers, leeches, glommers, users, abusers, give them whatever lable you like – they exist and in some numbers. The people who somehow infer themselves into your life and you suddenly find your life is all about them. Suddenly, you a rational, straight thinking individual are doing cartwheels, groveling, playing nursemate, hand-holder (fill in the blank) to the demise of the rest of your life, in favor of pleasing this person. Making this person happy. Making amends to this person for all the terrible things that have happened to them in their lives (even though you had nothing to do with any of it).
Often you have out of body experiences where you’re looking down at yourself all atither over this person and wondering what the hell you’re doing, yet you can’t stop yourself. You are compelled, you are obsessed, you are out of control on the issue and there seems no way to end it.
Sound familiar? My theory is that everyone has had at least one wind stealer. One inescapable con artist who has convinced them that they owe loyalty, money, resources, time, love, care (again, fill in the blank) to this person. That they just do and they can’t escape that possibility.
How does it happen? Your guess is as good as mine but usually it starts out with the wind stealer ‘helping’ you in some way. Though the help is usually marginal, they manage to get you thinking that it was was somehow life changing and huge and that you now owe them a huge debt. Once they’ve got you there, you’re pretty much sunk. They have just managed to turn your own good intentions against you. Your own sense of fairness and love of people into a weapon that can wound you continually. In some cases, it can be so bad that it can drive normal, rational people mad. I’m convinced that those stories you hear about the mild mannered fellow who was a good family man just one day went off and blew his wife’s head off, is in a situation like this. And one probably close to home.
I don’t know what the answer is to this because everyone has to deal in their own way but for me a clean break is the only answer. Once I’ve seen that I have one of these varmits in my life there is no in-between about it. Just sever all ties. It’s hard as hell and I’ve been plagued with doubts and guilt over it – but I’ll tell you one other thing, I have experienced almost instant relief when doing this. It’s almost like a magic drug. I suddenly just feel like myself again. Weird, huh?
How about you, any wind stealers in your life? What are you going to do about it?