If I knew then what I know now – how things would have been different. My choices would have followed a different path. My heart wouldn’t have risked it all for the nothing that lie ahead.
I would have been braver and smarter. No – I would have been wiser.
I wouldn’t have bestowed my trust so easily – believed your words so completely. I wouldn’t have needed to because I wouldn’t have needed you.
I would have believed in me instead of you. I would have listened to the alarms sounding in my head. Danger. I wouldn’t have doubted my own truth and understanding.
If I knew then what I know now, I wouldn’t have spent my tears on such worthless folly. I wouldn’t have handed over my dreams to one who didn’t value or care for them.
I wouldn’t have tried to save you from yourself, nor pawned my loyalty off to the lowest bidder.
But now I see. So clearly. All of it. I see the plan in which I was the disposable pawn. Check Mate. Stale Mate. Queen takes King. Game over.
My words had meaning because I meant them but yours were just words uttered toward an end of unknown motive.
If I knew then what I know now, it would have been different. It would have been better. I would have been safe.
But you cannot know what you haven’t learned. And you cannot learn if you do not try.
What’s happening with Christine, now?