all in all out


Somebody who was undoubtedly zen-like said, “All things in moderation” – it was probably Benjamin Franklin or someone wise like he. I, however, am not wise because I simply can’t do things in moderation. Try as I might it just isn’t my thing.

I’m either all in or all out. I sometimes wonder where this predisposition came from. My mother, my father? Some eccentric old auntie whose name slips past my consciousness? For all I know it could have been a neighbor dog I bonded with when I was three. Whoever or whatever it was, sure gave me the attitude early on since that’s just been the story of my life.

For instance, I don’t just drive to work in the morning – I have a freeking adventure. I’m simply not happy to drive quietly, listening to the radio as I make my way to whatever destination is slated for the day. Nope, I have to utter editorial comment, driving instruction and sometimes serious insult to those sharing the road with me. I know, I know, it probably comes as a shock to some of you -–sweet Annie being mean to other drivers, hanging out the window and telling them they should be home watching Good Morning America, so the rest of us can be safe – but what can I say? I’m a passionate person.

If I love something I really love it. I can’t shut up about it and friends have been known to screen my calls when I’ve made a new discovery because they just can’t stand to hear one more word about the miraculous benefits of roller ball pens or MSM or chocolate over bananas for breakfast. Conversely if I hate something I really hate it. I can’t stand to have it around me, to think about it to have others think about it or say a word about it. Well, maybe it’s not that bad but you get the picture.

Sometimes I think this is a real flaw in my character too. I see others living relatively smooth, even lives, going along like a sail boat on smooth waters and I think, that would be nice. I would like that. Yet, whenever things are just too even, too predictable I get antsy and nervous. It’s just too, I don’t know…normal? Even? Calm? It just doesn’t feed my passion.

Other times I think it’s really the only way to be. If you’re going to live life, why not make it a circus parade and interesting? Why not wear your passion on your sleeve for all to see? You might as well be interested in what you’re doing, seeing, hearing, feeling, right? It certainly does provide fodder for writing. And maybe that’s it. Maybe that’s why I am that way or maybe because I am that way is why I write. Could be potato/potaatoe?

How about you? Are you all in or all out? Calm and serene or passionate and wild? Moderate or over the top?



2 thoughts on “Moderation

  1. Hi Annie,

    Hehe!! Bad ass Annie. Moderation Umm! Nah it doesn’t come as a shock to me that you hurl abuse sometimes on the road.

    I have a little story. I don’t drive, Im a pedestrain. A driver was hurling abuse on my street so Di goes outside barefoot in my dressing gown and became on the recieving end of the abuse. I asked the man to get out of the car to talk, he told me to get in the car to talk so I get hold of the handle to open the door and he drives off.

    Do you think I let go of the handle. NO. I held on for dear life, he had to stop, he was frothing at the mouth and wierd veins in his neck were prutruding. My dressing gown slipped open at one point, I saw his eyes scan my body and he told me to ‘ Get back in the house whore where you belong’ Out off absoulte rage ( I’ve never done this before ) I open my dressing gown so he could see the whole of my body clad in black underwear and did a very sexy sultry twirl in the street and said to him ‘ Now go and fuck yourself and fuck of off my street.

    That worked, he got back in his car and drove off. Hehe !! You’ve no idea how proud of myself I was. I laugh every time I think about it. Out of pure rage and anger I expose myself to a mad man. How cool is that in the grand scheme of things. Hehe !!

    Yes if I love I love passionatly. I love laods of stuff, I feel love or fall in love every day, yup every single day. I love that story I’ve just told and I love your post. If I do hate which I don’t very often ( just my son last week ) I don’t hate for long. Thank God. Hate is really powerful for me. Its an emotion that just doesn’t sit right with me.

    Yes I would say I’m a passionate person and moderation I quess I don’t have it in some ways but in other ways I have it big time. Life or my head is an adventure and I love it today. Life or my head has always been an adventure for me but for a lot of years not in a good way.

    This has been a great psot Annie, I read it yesterday on a friend’s computer and wanted to comment then. I was giggling to myself but I find I can’t write when others are in the room. I don’t flow like I like to.
    Love to you bad ass Annie ~ Smilimg.

    Hey Di,
    That’s a great story – I would have given anything to see the look on that old bugger’s face. He deserved it and more. You’re such a kick. Thanks for sharing.

    Bad ass Annie 😆


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