Some People Will Beat You Down – A Word About Bullies


Despite all my years on this planet I am still shocked by how cruel some people can be. I don’t know why but I keep thinking that somehow mankind will snap out of it and people will start being kinder to each other. I’m still waiting for that to happen.

Actually, that’s not fair. Most people are really okay. Pretty good eggs, as they say. But there are some…

A few weeks ago, I was contacted by someone to do a writing project for them. We discussed the project and what he wanted done and I gave him my best advice. As it turned out, I didn’t feel he really needed to change what he had and told him so. He thanked me for my time and that was that. A couple of hours later he contacted me again and said he wanted me to re-do one aspect of the project. I agreed and gave him a quote. Then he wanted to haggle the price. I told him I didn’t haggle. Then he said okay. Then he asked if I paid the PayPal fees. At that point I should’ve just passed and suggested he go elsewhere. But I was in the midst of three other projects and knew he’d keep bugging me, so I went ahead with it.

Suffice to say that afterward we had several more email exchanges, during which he insulted me, my abilities and my worth. In all, I probably devoted about eight hours to this person, all for the incredibly high price of $50. So. Not. Worth. It.

It upset me, the things he said. The insults. But after my bruised feelings healed I realized he’d done me a favor. Because he reminded me of something that I knew but ignored.

People will beat you down. Some people will just beat you down for sport. It is in fact their purpose in life. They thrive on it. They like to make others unhappy. To feel small and insignificant. I don’t know why this is true. Did God make them differently? Perhaps. But it’s actually okay not to know why, as long as you know that they do.

They come in all shapes and sizes – don’t let the packaging fool you

I think most of us think of bullies as big, bad-breathed, butt-crack showing cretins who have “I am an asshole” tattooed on their foreheads. In fact they don’t. Often they come in very pretty or handsome packages. Sometimes they are young, sometimes old. They could be your neighbor or your Aunt Tillie. They can be a teacher, a parent, a sibling or the guy next to you with road rage. In short, they can be anybody. So you can’t know them by the way they look but you can by the way they act, for example a bully will try to convince you that:

  • Everything they do is important
  • Everything you do is meaningless
  • Their feelings matters
  • Your feelings don’t matter and you’re just being a drama queen
  • You should keep your word
  • They aren’t required to keep their promises
  • You made them feel this way, so what they do to you is your own fault

In short, a bully will do anything in their power to make you feel small, worthless, stupid, ugly, repulsive, unlovable, unlikable and useless.

Kick them to the curb

Bullies, unfortunately – at least in my experience – cannot or will not reform. If they get called on something, they may recant but it is insincere. Don’t believe them. They will only strive to get back in your good graces so that they can hammer you again. They will cry, threaten to harm themselves, even claim to have gotten religion. Don’t believe them. They only thing they want to get is you. Don’t make it possible for them to do so. Just kick them to the curb and move on. Believe me, if you do, you’ll feel much better.

Writer Chick
Copyright 2015

The Ant Brigade

Recently I’ve had to accept gainful employment. Tough sell for someone who has been self-employed for quite a while. But it sure beats the heck out of being broke, hungry and homeless.

The job itself is fine, it’s website/Internet related and pretty much right up my alley. And of course you can always learn new things and to be honest I’ve learned quite a lot which will be helpful in future pursuits.

The interesting thing to me is that I realized it isn’t the working a job thing that really bothers me – it’s the ant brigade – aka the daily commute. After just a few short months I feel I have a whole new insight on road rage and bizarre behaviors reported on the nightly news.

I try to be easy going and just go with the flow. But when you are half asleep, driving on a road with hundred of others who are also half asleep, coffee deprived, distracted and actually dreading arriving at the office being easy going can be quite the challenge.

In my commuter adventures my favorite pet peeves are:

The bicyclist who thinks that pedaling down the middle of the lane with 20 cars behind him makes perfect sense.

The senior citizen who is so unsure of the integrity of their brakes that they never take their foot off the brake pedal.

The school kids and skateboarders who want to play chicken at the four way stop when it’s your turn to move.

The guy who waits to turn left in front of you until you are 10 feet away from him.

The fruit vendor who stops traffic because the lady in the hybrid can’t decide which bag of oranges she wants.

The texting idiot who keeps drifting into your lane then flips you off when you tap your horn.

The guy who suddenly realizes he has to stop at McDonald’s and crosses three lanes to get there.

The list can go on and on but you get the picture.

The really sad thing is that most of what I do at the ‘office’ I could do from home in my jim-jams. Unfortunately, companies insist you present a body at their house and jim-jams are not allowed.

*Sigh* I live for the day when once again my biggest commute is from my bed to my desk.

How about you, what is your ant brigade like?

Writer Chick
Copyright 2012

Spam and Affiliate Marketing

In the last couple of months I’ve been researching affiliate marketing to see if it was a viable avenue to create some passive income. I’ve learned a lot and although I probably won’t participate in any serious affiliate marketing I discovered a few tips that would help any online business improve its traffic and hopefully the bottom line.

However, another thing that I realized – let’s call it a side benefit –  is where a lot of that pesky spam comes from that we all have to deal with.

Affiliate Marketing Basics

The general idea behind affiliate marketing is that you promote someone else’s product and if someone buys the product using your link you are paid a commission.  The amount of the commission varies, depending on the product, but if you do it right and find a product that is in high demand you can make some decent income. The affiliate marketing universe has thousands upon thousands of available products to promote from gout remedies to information products – but a couple of the highest paying affiliate programs are adult products and drugs.  I guess that makes sense since drugs and sex have been money generators since the beginning of time.  For me, these two categories cover just about all the spam that I get.

Now, I’m the last person in the world who would discourage any budding entrepreneur from spreading her wings and building her empire but…if you are going to participate in affiliate marketing you should do it right. Spamming forums, blogs and other websites that are irrelevant to your market is only going to end up sending you to the spam box. Especially if you use bot programs and other methods to do massive hits to sites.

If I understand the concept correctly, you are supposed to build your site and backlinks by finding relevant forums, etc. in which to disseminate your product promotion. Spamming inappropriate sites will only piss people off and get you nowhere. I understand that those hefty commissions are very attractive and that you figure that throwing your net out in every possible direction will result in big money. But the truth is that all you are doing is counter-productive and not earning you any brownie points or commissions I would imagine.

I think the thing that stymies me is that the folks pulling this type of stunt must know that their ‘comments’ end up in the spam box and therefore they have exerted energy that will cause anyone to profit.  So why do they do it? Even in the case of abandoned blogs where spam does manage to get into the comments section aren’t likely to be read much less clicked on.  And I’m pretty sure Google isn’t giving you better rankings for spamming people so…

Please stop

I know, I know, I’m wasting my breath – I guess I just needed to vent and share my little realization. Perhaps it will make other bloggers feel better to know that spam isn’t personal – it’s just a random act of annoyance.  Still, you’d think with all the information floating around these yahoo’s would figure it out. But unfortunately any idiot with a computer and an internet connection can annoy people with impunity these days.

How about you guys – any elucidating thoughts on the source and cause of spam? LOL.

Writer Chick

copyright 2011

Truth, Justice & the American Way – Meh…Not So Much…

Well it had to happen sooner or later, didn’t it?  SuperMan is officially a one-world-order-global warming-UN loving- drone. I think super heroes everywhere should be shaking their heads and rolling their eyes. Don’t you? I mean seriously what other country would super heroes have come from? Russia, China, Iran? Come on folks, superhero-dom is uniquely American – there is no other government on Earth that would stand for it, is there?

I had to laugh though, that StuporMan decided to make his announcement at the UN – maybe he’s more assured that he won’t get beaned with some rotten tomatoes there? Could be.  Oh well, Stupor Man go and be free and live in the one world order of mediocrity – in fact, take all  your p.c. friends with you – we Americans won’t mind one bit.

So much for civil discourse

Just a few weeks ago, conservatives were being accused of spurring on the hateful actions of the Arizona shooter who killed six and injured thirteen.  There was an enormous amount of talk about being more civil.  So much so that a campaign to have Conservatives and Liberals sit together at the State of the Union address (no doubt later, holding hands and singing kumbayah) to show that we can all get along despite our differences.

Track up to this week – I think I’ll say it in pictures…



That’s right folks – we’re talking some serious civil discourse over disagreements.  Seems when it comes to contributing to one’s own healthcare and pension is on the table, teacher’s think the taxpayers are the ones to pay, not them. Clearly they are concerned about the economy and jobs – however, it seems it’s their personal economies and jobs they are concerned about.  Not yours or mine, or anyone else’s.  God forbid government employees should have to sustain a little bit of the hurt that the rest of us are feeling.

And like spoiled children who want to pout and not play the game, they called in sick so they could throw a public temper tantrum.

Oh yeah and while we’re on the subject – aren’t Republicans the ones who are the party of no?  Funny because all the Democrat state legislatures left town and are hiding out so they don’t have to vote on the governor’s bill.  At least we showed up and voted – and let our votes be counted.

Yes, we must all be civil, unless we’re government employees or or pissed off libbies.

Governor Walker, I salute you and pray you can and do persevere.   Wisconsin teachers…perhaps you should go back to work and do the job you are being paid for instead of whining about the public’s desire to reduce its indebtedness to you.  Many of us would actually like to have a job to go to, even if we had to contribute to our own health care and pension.  Maybe if you lose your jobs you’ll rethink your position.  We can only hope.


PS:  Note to the president:  You may want to pay attention to what is happening in Wisconsin and apparently stirring up in other states.  Many governors have decided to actually listen to the taxpayers and act accordingly – so choosing your side carefully could be a good idea.


Dear Mr. Gubberment

Dear Mr. Gubberment

When I was a kid I watched lots of old movies – especially B movies. In those B movies there was often some backwoods, gun-toting, paranoid country fella who was on the look out for rev-a-nooers. Lately, I’m starting to understand his paranoia. In the case of the movie character it was generally linked to the fact that the fella had a still producing moonshine somewhere on the back property. In my case it has more to do with not needing nor wanting a babysitter or replacements for the parental units. More and more it seems our government feels duty bound to guide us in our every decision.

I don’t know about you, but I am fully capable of making my own decisions and living with the consequences happily. When it comes to my own life, I quite literally don’t recognize any authority higher than myself. And there are many things I think Mr. Gubberment should have nothing to do with. Such as:

Admonishing me for eating certain foods and not eating others. What I put in my body is my business. You say that abortion is okay because a woman has the right to determine what goes on with her body and yet in the same breath you can tell me I can’t eat a ho-ho, a big mac or chili dog?

Telling me I’m too fat. Well maybe I am but what business is it of yours? If I have to struggle into a size sixteen that’s punishment enough without listening to the big-bootied first lady preach about vegetables. She’s not the boss of me.

Using tax dollars to promote stupid things like, breast feeding, organic vegetables, school lunches and anything else.  Much less giving tax breaks for such things. It’s not that I have anything against any of these things but the government is supposed to be concerned with roads, security and other similar matters. Not how we feed our children or where we buy our food.

Punishing people for being successful. Hey, sure I’m envious of people who have a lot of money. I’d like to have a lot of money too. But I never think it belongs to me because I want it. That is theft. Why then do you get to decide who makes too much money and that you can take it and give it to other people who want it?

Forcing me to buy something I don’t want. Yep, that’s right, not all of us want health insurance. Is this a shock to you? Well, I don’t get sick, have accidents and have an illnesses. I don’t need health insurance. Besides, aren’t all those taxes levied on cigarettes, liquor, and junk food meant to pay for health care services? I also don’t’ want to be forced to buy a hybrid, any green technology, or panty liners. If I want something I will buy it. If I don’t’, I won’t. Pretty simple really.

It’s not that I have anything against you in particular, Mr. Gubberment – government can be a good thing in a civil society. But you have to get over yourself and realize we don’t need extra parents – for the most part, our parents did or are doing just fine. That we know more about our lives and our decisions therefore make more sense than any decision you might make for us (no matter how well intended). That if Americans wanted a king, the American Revolution would never have happened.

Copyright 2011

Ten Headlines I Don’t Want to See on Drudge

If you’re like me, one of your guilty pleasures is hitting the Drudge website a couple of times of day to see the latest and greatest headlines. Some of us are even addicted enough that if we don’t get our Drudge fix on a daily basis we get all jittery and floopy.

However, over the last couple of years some of headlines have bordered on the ridiculous. Perhaps it’s the constant, non-stop news cycle but it seems that Drudge is a little hard up for titillating headlines and opts for anything that might get anyone’s attention. A little disappointing for me, since it used to be that Drudge was a true source of inspiration for blog posts and commentary.

So Matt, if you’re reading, following are some headlines I’m really hoping you aren’t considering:

1. Old People Still Do It and Here’s How…(Seriously Jane, haven’t we learned enough about what goes on in your sick little mind?)
2. The Top Ten Airport Scanner Naked Images (Haven’t we seen enough anonymous individual’s junk yet?)
3. Joe Biden Proven to Actually Have an IQ (Found during full body scan)
4. Oprah Has Lap Band Surgery Live on her Show (The woman has no shame and will go to any length to celebrate victim hood and we should stop enabling her.)
5. The First Couple Kisses Under the White House Mistletoe (Caution: Tongue Involved)
6. Live! Mel Gibson Drunken Psycho Video (We get it, he’s a bigot and people are making him pay for it.)
7. Charlie Sheen on the Set of Girls Gone Wild (We get it. he’s a misogynistic horn dog.)
8. Obama Does Extended Pat-Down of Michelle to Show They Aren’t That Bad (Although it might be a nice change to see him groping someone other than the American taxpayers)
9. Nancy Pelosi to Play Santa in Annual San Francisco Christmas Parade (She’s already scary enough, no need to terrorize children too.)
10. Anything with the word shock in it. (Practically every day we see the word shock and frankly the word shock is losing its shock value.)

Ten Headlines I’d like to see on Drudge

Conversely, the following are headlines I’d probably love to see on Drudge. Although I won’t hold my breath…

1. Al Gore slapped with carbon fines for excessive flatulence. (Cows aren’t the only ones who stink up the environment.)
2. David Letterman tell all memoir reveals he knows he is not funny. (If he would just admit and join a program…)
3. TSA Finally Decides to use Criminal Profiling to Ferret out Terrorists. (I know, I know, a government agency doing something that makes sense, truly a  pipe dream.)
4. Full Body Scanners Removed from Airports and Relocated to Border Crossings.  (Finally, some real bang for our buck.)
5. We Don’t Care Who Won Dancing With the Stars.  (No, really we don’t.)
6. Unions Deemed Unconstitutional by Supreme Court.  (Oh well, there goes the Democrat majorities.)
7. California Demands a Recall of Governor Jerry Brown.  (You think I’m kidding but I’m not.)
8. American Farmers no Longer Paid Not to Grow Crops. (What a novel idea.)
9. Government Memo Instructs all Government Employees to Pay Back Taxes or Lose Their Jobs. (Equality is what I’m talking about.)
10. Nobel Committee Recalls Obama’s Award. (What we thought was going to happen didn’t, so we changed our mind.)

Bonus headline:

Government deems no business too big to fail. (That’s what I’m talking about!)
How about you? What headlines do you or don’t you want to see? Feel free to add to the list.


copyright 2010

You Might be a Candidate for a Pat-down if…

Wow, lots of hoopla about current airport security measures of late. I have to say that they do seem extreme. In their rush not to be racially profiling, it seems the TSA has taken it to an absolute fault. Frisking nuns, children, and even teddy bears, when as far as I can tell they don’t fit the profile. Boy them terrorists must really be laughing at us pretty hard. I mean for an actual young, adult male of middle-eastern descent to be pulled for an extended search, he would have to shave his beard and body hair, exchange his turban for a baseball cap, bleach his hair and don designer sunglasses.

Based on recent reading I’ve developed a list of what might make a merry traveler raise the red flag for the ol’ pat-down – you might be a candidate for a pat-down if…

1. You look harmless, excessively white or Christian.
2. You refuse to give up your binky and teddy bear while walking through the metal detector.
3. You use a walker or are wheelchair bound.
4. You voice concern about being radiated by the full body scanners.
5. You’re a young, beautiful college student and your dad appears to be a Republican.
6. You’re dressed as a pilot or a flight attendant.
7. You’re too old and/or frail to raise your arms over your head whilst spread eagle.
8. You express distress over a complete stranger seeing your naked image on a monitor (forget about asking if they destroy the images and how you might verify that).
9. You’re under three feet tall and don’t have a strong lobby in Washington D.C.
10. You’re a pretty, inquisitive, conservative radio talk show host.
11. You tell an agent not to touch your junk.
12. You argue about giving up your four ounce bottle of sunblock.
13. You have artificial body parts, surgical pins, prosthesis, pace-maker or a navel ring.
14. You are wearing a skirt or other bulky clothing (middle eastern garb excepted).

Conversely, you are probably pretty safe from a pat-down if…

1. You carry a prayer rug with you.
2. You are a young adult male of middle-eastern descent.
3. You are wearing a burkah or a face mask.
4. You adjust yourself because the gunpowder in your boxers is really irritating your nads.
5. You speak little to no english and are wearing sand-encrusted sandals.
6. You have goats milk in your sippy cup.
7. You call the TSA agent a white, American devil.
8. You seem disoriented and are muttering to yourself about the great satan.

I don’t know about you but I won’t be flying the unfriendly skies for a while. Until security is about security rather than incompetence – about pro-action rather than reaction – I think I’ll just take a bus or something.

How about you – like those pat downs? Are you that lonely? And feel free to add to the list.

copyright 2010

Teachers have sure changed since I was a kid…

This vid is a real eye opener. Teachers have really changed since I went to school. The thing I found disturbing is that our tax dollars just bailed these jokers out. Have to say, I’m happy I don’t have kids – placing my children with people like this in any position of authority would give me nightmares.