Bad Hair Day – and Then Some

Just when you think you can’t find a parking space, a brilliant idea strikes you. Funny how a few drinks and lack of sleep can get your brain thinking outside the box, eh?

I guess this is what happens when you let the horse do the driving. Still, there he is again in the driver’s seat. Go figure.

Well, I’m all for curtesy on the road, but you actually need a shoulder to pull over on, doncha?

I’ve always been a little jealous that public servants get to park wherever they want – but you have to wonder, how exactly they managed to squeeze into that space. I’m sure it was meant for a compact car.

Happy Sunday, everybody and remember, drive defensively. 😉


The Gee-Golly Finale


Okay, so now the new American Idol is the screechy girl. Too bad, I was pulling for beat-box boy. At least he was interesting. She’ll become a compliant little diva and probably sell out concerts for little girls who dream of being the next big voice on Idol too. Providing it’s still around by then.

 I have to say this finale, left me a bit cold. They seemed more interested in pimping their causes and showcasing other artists than what I thought the show was supposed to be about. We actually barely saw the contestants and when we did, they were usually singing back up or something. They actually gave a solo spot to Sanjaya, so he could assault us, yet again with his inept and off key stylings of a rock song. I don’t think I can ever listen to it again without cringing. In fact, I’ve forgotten what it was I was so traumatized by his shredding of it.

The best part of it (and honestly, the only reason I watched) was Taylor and his jacket. At least the guy has a pulse and tried to get people up on their feet. Is it me, or was the audience just made up of celebrities, their relatives and relatives of the American Idol folks?

And the report card section with old Clive was more like a public bashing then what I think it was supposed to be. Why didn’t he just say, “All hail the bald bag of angst and the country Barbie Doll,” and leave it at that? And I’m just curious but how is it a Barbie Doll (clutching the mike stand for dear life, lest she fall off the stage) can sell 6 million fricking albums? I don’t get it. And who told her she could sing, “I’ll Stand By You” with any authority? Some songs can not be countrified and that’s one of them.

One more thing – Greenday (is that their name?) might want to g**gle Bob Dylan, he did it first and oh so much better. What passes as deep and profound songs these days don’t reach me – I mean, what does a kid with too much eyeliner and bad hair know about the working class? Over my head to be sure.

So congrats to Screechy Girl – you’ll be an American Idol diva in no time with a nice, generic diva album that little girls will buy in the millions. I have a feeling though, that Beat-Box Boy will do better – at least I’ll be buying his album – gotta love the dark horse and somebody who just does their own thing.

I shudder to think what next year’s Idol will produce. The recent compulsion to do spin off after spin off of the show tells me that the magic is starting to tarnish. Maybe we’ll luck out and “So You Think You Can Dance” will take center stage. Could happen.

What’s your take?


What Moms Will Do For Their Kids…


(My friend, the super-mom, sent me this true story of how she ‘helped’ her kids learn one of those scout-type lessons. Amazing, the lengths we’ll go to for our kids, eh?  😉 WC )

We had our Daisy troop meeting at Oakwood Park this afternoon so we could work on our “Making the World a Better Place” petal by going around the park picking up litter.  I got there with a handful of plastic grocery sacks so each girl could fill her own bag with litter.  Then we were going to talk about recycling as we took any bottles and cans we found and put them in a separate recycling bag. 

So, while the girls are playing before we get started, I look around and….. the park is spotless!!  No litter anywhere!!  Nothing!!  Our petal earning was in serious jeopardy

The only thing I could think of was to send my older daughter to our van (where there happens to be plenty of litter) to get some litter and go out and sprinkle it around ahead of us as we got started.  She said she got some strange looks from people as she was boldly and deliberately littering.  That is, before they saw our Daisies way behind on the trail squealing as they raced to pick up the scraps.

Thank God one of the boys playing basketball happened to finish his water bottle so we had something to recycle!

Technically, we didn’t really make the world a better place but I think they got the idea 😉  Too bad there isn’t a “Make your leader’s van a better place” petal.  😉

(LOL- that’s what I call ingenuity!  WC)

Could You Just Grunt, Or Something?


You know, I’m usually pretty easy going about things. I realize that people have lives and everybody has their own style – but I do have a little pet peeve I want to air.

I just don’t understand it when bloggers don’t even bother to acknowledge a comment you’ve made. How much trouble could it be to just say, ‘thanks,’ or ‘okay’ or ‘good point’? Or something?

I realize that not all bloggers are like me and get into the back and forth with their readers. Maybe some feel uncomfortable doing it or don’t really know what to say. But heck, the whole idea of blogging is to put out an idea and get people to engage in that idea with you, isn’t it? Is it really too much to expect at least a grunt or something? You know, I’ve come to your blog and I’ve read your post and I made a comment, I didn’t lurk, I didn’t stop in mid-read, I didn’t click away – I stayed, I read, I commented. But you can’t say, boo?

Another thing – that in my mind, is even worse –  is selective response to comments. I don’t quite understand this approach. What is it, some commenters are better than others or deserve your acknowledgement while others don’t? Sorry, but to me that’s just wrong.

 If a writer/blogger expects to get someone to respond to their words, what makes them think that they shouldn’t respond in kind? I’m just wondering. Does anybody have any thoughts on this?

Don’t get me wrong, this isn’t a pitied plea for comments or sympathy.I don’t need either or to have my ego soothed. It’s not about ego, it’s about manners. In this day and age, manners have rapidly dwindled to near-extinction. People don’t think they have to say thank you or please or excuse me anymore. I don’t know why, but they don’t. It’s no wonder to me that there is so much road rage and people going postal. Treating people as if they are invisible is never a good habit to develop.

Anyway, no big deal – just a mini-rant. Feel free to add to the rant or offer some opinion about it. I’m curious to know what other bloggers think.


 PS: On another note – one of our own needs a little help – all prayers accepted. Thanks!

A Meme of My Own

It seems that everybody is meme-ing lately, and I thought, what the heck, I’ll try one of my own. Feel free to jump in, with lists, opinions and heck if you want to consider yourself tagged, then please feel free.

1. The nicest thing anyone ever said to me: My friend Allen told me he thought I’d be a great teacher. That’d I’d be known as ‘that really cool teacher that everybody loves.’

2. The song that never fails to get me over myself: Layla – original version.

3. Worst day of my life: The day my dad died. I was upset all day and didn’t understand why. Nearly got fired from my job and ended up sobbing in my car after work. When I got home, there was a message on my answering machine from my step-mom and of course, I knew. There would have been no other reason for her to call me, since I barely knew her and she and my dad married long after I moved to California and had a life of my own. I devastated before I even dialed the phone, which took all the strength I had. All the colors in my life, drabbed down for quite a while after that.

4. Scariest bug I ever saw: I still don’t know what it was. I was living in one of those hillside cabin type homes that are popular and plenty in L.A. It was a somewhat rustic place that we rented from an ex-hippie – but it came with a garden and a 90 step walk from the street up the hill to get to it. One night, I’m chatting with my chum, Ruthy and out from behind the couch comes this giant ant-like, albino creature that seemed to give me the hairy eyeball. My bowl of popcorn went flying and I screamed. Ruthy took her size 10 shoe and splat went the scarey bug. Still gives me shivers.

5. Weirdest exchange I’ve ever had with another human being: When I first moved to L.A., I lived in an area that was near MacArthur Park. It was a bizarre neighborhood and it provided my first real experience with bag ladies and bag men (now called the homeless). They were all interesting characters, albeit tortured human beings. One lady in particular, we used to call Tinkerbell because she walked around dressed in a tutu and carried a wand with a paper, glittery star attached to it.

One day, she wandered into the office I worked in and in a very heavy Hungarian accent asked to see the owner. I informed her he wasn’t there. She smirked and told me it was because she was the owner of the business. Yes, she was sure of it and she wanted me to show her where her office was. I tried to reason with her but she was relentless and refused to leave. I got up from my seat and tried to escort her out of the building but she started thwapping me with her magic wand and screamed, “help, police. help, help, help!” Then just as suddenly as she started all the nonsense, she left – flipping me the bird on her way out.

6. My first devastating moment: When I was about 8, being the good Catholic girl that I was – I prepared for my First Communion. To be honest, I truly had no understanding of it and why all the fuss, but good girls do as the parents say. Two days before the event I was taken to the beauty parlor by my aunt to ‘get my hair done.’ This was very exciting because I’d never been to the beauty parlor except to watch my Mom and other adults get their hair done. Lucky me. Except, I had really long hair. It was fine and very wavy. A mass of tangles and knots that my mother complained about brushing. You guessed it – after my shampoo and conditioning my aunt told the lady to cut my hair. The woman whacked off about 3 inches – I winced but it wasn’t too bad. Then my aunt shook her head no and mouthed the word, ‘more.’ Next thing I knew all my beloved hair was on the floor and I had a bob. I cried for 2 weeks. There isn’t one salvagable photograph from my First Communion because I gave everyone the evil eye the whole day. And really it took me a long time to forgive God.

7. A talent most people don’t know I have: Two talents actually – I can almost always find lost items, particularly keys – unless it’s me who has lost them. I have an amazing knack for remember useless and trivial facts.

8. The funniest thing I’ve ever said out loud: Why are dead people driving cars?

9. Worst gift I ever got from a significant other: A snickers bar, in a plastic grocery bag, for Valentine’s Day. And no, there wasn’t a card in there either.

10. Favorite punchline(s): 1. You had Johnny Ringo’s gal. 2. God Ma, sometimes you really piss me off.

11. Weirdest food I’ve ever eaten: Smoked eel. I was on a blind date with a loser who thought he was quite sophisticated. He insisted on taking me to a Sushi restaurant despite my protestations and was hurt when I ordered Tempura. He forced me to tried smoked eel from his plate, which tasted like barbecued tire. I spit it into my napkin and never saw him again.

12. Strangest thing I ever got paid to do: Buffing a bus with Zelda. It’s too long a story to tell here, so I will have to do a future post about it. But take my word for it, bus buffers have a mind of their own.

13. The one modern convenience I couldn’t live without: A flushing toilet. I can manage without a computer, without a cell phone, a television and even a car – but I could never make it if I had to rely on latrines, outhouses or worse.

14. What I want written on my tombstone: Thanks for laughing.

15. Creepiest landlord I ever had: Elliot. I lived in a guest house on the back of his property. It was a great little place and I really loved it. Until, I had to go to the front house and pay the rent. Then I would have to engage in a conversation with a man who would make Rod Serling sit up and take notice. He had two club feet and so walked with canes and wore thick, eyeglasses that made his eyes look 5 times their size. Also one of those eyes seem to wander in the opposite direction of the other. I lived there for many years and even though he was creepy, given his infirmities I didn’t worry about my welfare, however, I constantly got obscene phone calls. One day, it dawned on me that it was Elliot making the calls. I had my number changed and miraculously, the calls stopped until….I was forced to give him my number. Then of course they would start again. I had my number changed, again and again and again – always with the same result. Even to this day it kind of creeps me out to think about it.

16. Most useless item I ever bought: A cardboard cat-scratcher from Trader Joe’s. Now I love TJ’s as much as the next person – but don’t ever buy this item. Besides the fact that it is impossible to actually put together, it’s a really just a hunk of very expensive cardboard.

17. Most unusual thing I ever cooked: Crawdads. Now, I realize that these are a common southern delicacy and in fact, they are quite delicious. But the thing that makes it unusual is because of the way we happened upon the crawdads. There is a little park that is a sort of annex into Griffith Park, which is a huge national park out here. A few of us decided to have a picnic in this little park annex and happened upon a crik (creek) and we noticed these tiny lobster like creatures strolling around on the bottom. Next thing I knew somebody found some string, bread and cheeze whiz and we were fishing crawdads. We caught an entire bucketful, probably got the entire crawdad population in that crik – then we went home and threw them in a pot of boiling water. Yum, yum, they was some good eatin’.

So there you have it, all the stuff you never wanted to know about me. What about you?


Chicks in dah Hood

Oh yeah, that’s what I’m talking about!

 Apparently, this is what I have to look forward to in my twilight years. Although, who can complain about an awesome biker jacket and doo-rag? Not I, my friends, not I. 😉


An Answer For Everything…


When I was a kid, my mom used to say I always had an answer for everything, which was code for ‘you’re such a smart aleck’ but I enjoyed nonetheless.

Well, this isn’t really a post about that though.

Debi of Ms Crankypants has posed three questions for me to answer -an off-shoot of the whole Alabaster Crippens meme – and I decided to answer them here.

So here goes:

1) What event from your childhood or teen years still has a lasting effect on you to this day?

This is a tough one because it is quite personal. But what the heck… When I was about 12, I was very excited because I had managed to save a good deal of money for Christmas gifts. I really wanted to buy something special for my mother. So, I really budgeted the money for the other gifts on my list so I’d have enough left over to buy her a real gold cross on a chain. She had mentioned many times how she had wanted one and I was thrilled that I was going to be able to give her one. I bought the cross, tiny though it was and on a very delicate chain, it was still 14k gold and I couldn’t wait for Christmas day to arrive.

After weeks of agonizing waiting Christmas day arrived and I gave her the gift. Beside myself with anticipation. When she opened it, she cried and I was elated that she was so touched. But then she said, ‘It’s so small. Is that all you think of me, to give me something so small?’ (or words to that effect). I was crushed of course and disappointed. And I think I tried to explain to her but honestly, it’s a bit of a blur what was said after that point.

At the time, I thought she was being mean. Or maybe that she just didn’t love me very much or less than my brothers and sister. And I vowed I would never buy her anything that would ever enter the area of ‘special’ again because I couldn’t bear that kind of reaction from her again.

But in retrospect, I don’t think she was being mean. I think that she had many insecurities and self doubts. And that for some reason that necklace reinforced those insecurities and doubts. That in her mind, it validated her fear that she didn’t matter. And to me, that is even sadder that my mother wouldn’t know how much I was trying to please her and make her happy.

It has always affected my relationship with her and I’ve always felt tenuous with her and worry whenever I have to buy her a gift or send her a card. I try to pretend that it doesn’t matter but it does. She has a birthday coming up and I spent days trying to find something to send her that I thought she would like. I settled on something but I have little hope she’ll like it. I know she’ll say she does but…

Anyway, that’s the answer to that one.

2) What is the purpose of imagination and where does it come from?

I believe the purpose of imagination is to bring about the future. Without imagination, we would not have any of our modern technology, music, art, literature – artists are the dreamers of our society and they through their art dream and bring into reality products of their imaginations.

3) What book would YOU want to have written, and why?

Without question I would have wanted to write Atlas Shrugged. There are several reasons why. I strongly identified with Dagny Taggert, a true individual who did not care what others thought of her and was guided by her own conscience and values, despite incredible influences to act otherwise. She would not compromise her beliefs or ideals. Also, I believe it is one of the most important books ever written because it makes the case that we are each responsible and accountable for our actions or inactions and that no one is owed a living, wherewithall, possessions, or status that is not earned. To me, a definitive text of the 20th century and modern society. And probably most importantly, because it was an elegant and flawlessly written story that continued until it was truly over. Rather than ending on a specified page count.

Well Debi, there you have it. That was interesting… 😉

This One’s For You, Sanjaya!

Sorry for all the vids but I had to post this one for our favorite idol disaster. WC

Really Stupid Shit Part Deux

I know you’ve all been out there waiting with baited breath for a sequel to this really popular post because when you get right down to it, you just can’t get enough stupid shit. But I like to change things up lest I end up in a rut, so rather than favorite stupid shit – I think we’ll go with annoying stupid shit this time out.

Ready? Good. Here we go

Stupidest remaining Idol Contestant: Tie. Sanjaya the bad singer with the good hair and blindingly white smile – who couldn’t sing if his life truly depended on it. He is only still on the show because weeping pre-teens can’t tell the difference between love and their impending hormones. It’s sweet in a real icky kind of way. But I hate to break it to you folks, he is one of the Top Ten. Any arguments that maybe they should have stopped at season 5?

The other ‘idol’ vying for the title is Chris Sligh (Sly? Are you kidding?) who is the self-appointed “Taylor” contestant for this year. He acts like a dark horse (he thinks), sings the same songs/material as Taylor (tries to Christ-i-cize it?) and just goes off key and nasal, does the fro thang, strolls through the crowd but looks like he wants to slap them out of his way rather than interact. Oh and his fans are calling themselves the Fro-Patrol. Excuse me while I puke. This kid is about as sincere as Paris Hilton while she is hanging out with her girlfriends’ boyfriends unchaperoned. He is the biggest phoniest jackass of a contestant I’ve seen on the show. I’ll bet the voice isn’t really his – he probably pipes it in through his ass from some high tech Ipod mike accessory. Pass the barfbag.

Stupidest Title for a movieMimzy or some shit. I don’t CARE if it is good. You just don’t call a movie Mimzy if you expect anyone over the age of three to go see it. Hey Joe, see any good movies lately? Oh yah Marge and I saw Mimsy – it was really fabulous. Jeez – come on!

Stupidest Talk Show Host: Rosie O’Donnell. What her producers seem to be missing is that talk show hosts are supposed to encourage the guests to talk. Not to slap them, gag them and force feed them their personal, commie, leftie, eco-whacko, insane-o views. Or am I missing something?

Stupidest TV Show: Oh there are soooooooo many but let me pick one from the new batch of shows. Now, mind you I am not going after any reality shows since in my mind they really aren’t tv shows but more like amatuer contests that are televised. No, I’m going after real, shows that are supposed to be real. Okay – Studio Sixty. I mean, hello? What the frick are they thinking here? First of all is Amanda Peet really going to go for Bradley Whitford? The guy has a huge head, it’s even a little scary. Imagine that coming at you ladies for a little good night smooch. Oh yeah. And then Matthew Perry is so schizoid he needs at least 10 offices for all his personalities and the girl he is supposed to be in love with is just too normal to ever really be attracted to a malignant narccissist like him and all his self-righteous spewing crapola. And remember folks, this is supposed to be a comedy, which means funny, right? While really all they are doing is tripping over themselves to spout whatever political ‘message’ is cool and p.c. and see who can talk the fastest. In a phrase it SUCKS!

Stupidest Rock Star: Hands down Bono: Where oh where do I begin? Okay, first of all is he really even that good of a singer? He is ugly as sin – so ugly in fact, he has to wear sunglasses everywhere he goes so the ugly rays do eat the flesh from his face and that of his fans. But what really makes him suck is this pompous, sanctimonious world peace faux world leader act of his. Does he really think anybody (who doesn’t want to get free tickets to rocks concerts populated by other pompous egotistical rock stars) is even remotely interested in his world plan? Sorry bub, but you actually have to get elected by people who know they are electing you, in order to have a say in what my country is going to do about anything. And by the way champ, get the hell out of the U.S. and U.S. affairs, who the hell asked you? How do you get off even hinting at what my tax dollars should be spent on? How dare you take my tax dollars and take credit for what they buy. Kiss my grits, dude. Big time.

Stupidest shit people do to their kids: A picture                             

is worth a thousand words. It’s not bad enought that this child is probably going to be raised by some doped up biker dude and biker chick, they have to turn him into some sort of mini me before he can even learn the words to protest. This mirror image approach to child rearing is just another disease of the yuppified self-absorbed. They don’t want to have children for the joy of having them and raising them to be their own man or woman – but rather they want to raise little clones of themselves so that they will be immortal.

Stupidest phrase: Politically Correct. What in the hell is correct about talking gibberish. I mean under what set of rules, grammar or otherwise does any of this doubletalk even begin to be correct? As for politics – we all know politics are lies and run by the lying liars who lie to get into office. So if something is politically correct isn’t the translation something like perfect lying?

Stupidest Shoes: Those sneakers that are really skates, no they are sneakers no they are skates, no they are sneakers that are skates – they are two, two, two shoes in one. What they are is an accident waiting to happen. It’s bad enough some fool came up with the idea but people are putting them on 6 year old who barely have enough sense not to play in the street much less navigate skating shoes down shopping market aisles . Which of course they don’t and they run smack into you and glare as though you are the cause of all their unhappiness. Between junk food, computers, Ipods and the fact that poor little Johnny shouldn’t have to actually walk to anyplace in the world (not even bed) this ain’t helping in the fight against adolescent obesity.

Stupidest Disease: Again, sooooooooooooooooo many to choose from but let’s go after restless leg syndrome. I mean, come on is this really a disease? From what I’ve read it’s just a magnesium deficiency, which I’d guess you could fix by taking magnesium. Why does every little thing that happens have to be a disease or a genetic defect? Why in the hell isn’t there one damn thing that people are supposed to be responsible for?

Stupidest News Story: The paternity of Ana-Nicole’s daughter. Come on folks, is this really news? I mean are things out there in the big, wide world, so easy going and calm and uneventful that who fathered an aging sex symbol’s daughter gets the headline banner. Not just once but for weeks? Really? So, like world hunger, world peace, tornados, beheadings, none of that takes precedence? Just what I thought all journalists are pussies and idiots who didn’t get their parents’ moneys worth on those fancy prep schools they all attended.

Other things that are just plain stupid pisser offers:

1. People who are too afraid to drive their cars. These are the folks who cause accidents and claim to be in them.

2. Claiming the price of gas is all because of the evil oil companies, with no mention of the taxes, initiatives, regulatory fees and every other little piece of garbage that is added to the price of gasoline which is hidden. No…let’s not tell the truth, let’s blame the guy that provides the goods.

3. Property taxes. Explain something to me, if you own something why would you pay someone else a tax for owning it? What Einstein thought this one up and why the hell does anyone pay it?

4. Giving anyone too young to pay for one on their own, a cell phone. What is the matter with parents today? They give 8 year olds cell phones and Ipods and then wonder how they get hit by cars. Aren’t kids absent-minded enough, you really have to give them things that will completely blot out the world around them? Why not just invest in that Matrix Condo Development now?

5. That cashiers can’t count. You know a bagillion years ago I worked as a waitress and often had to take money at the cash register. So if the bill was $2.26 and they gave you a five so you would count their change back to them like this: 27,28,29,30, 40,50,75, $3, $4, and $5. These days, they take the receipt and pile the bills and the change on top of that and jam it into your hand while peeking at the register to see how much they gave you. Not to mention the fact that they expect you to get the hell out of the way because the guy behind you is about ready to explode because you want to put your change back in your wallet before you grab your bags.

6. Restaurant workers who don’t speak english or have such a difficult time speaking it you cannot understand a word they say – especially at the drive through window. Sorry, but if you’re in America I believe you must speak English well enough to be understood – because if you can’t speak my language do you really think I’m going to trust in the fact that you’ll get my order right or my change? Get real.

7. The cigarette police, the fat police, the second hand smoke police (take your pick) they are the self-appointed assholes who must save society from itself while getting a whole of power for themselves too. Personally, I’m holding out for the bullshit police. I’d love to have some yahoo come along and save all of us from the bullshit that we’ve had shoveled on us from day one. I mean, have you ever asked yourself why it is that despite the trillions of dollars that have been donated and funded into heart disease, cancer, AIDS and so on that there is still no cure for any of it? Don’t you wonder why? Seriously? I’ll tell you why – it’s because they are now cottage industries that hire tons of people who would actually have to find work if cures were found. Most of that money never gets to the level of those who honestly want to find cures or solutions – it gets stuck at the administrative level. Please go save someone who needs saving and leave me alone. I am willing to accept responsibility for my actions.

8. Social Security and Medicare: Is there anyone of my generation out there who has any dillusions that they will collect one cent of the social security and medicare we have funded over our working careers? Anybody? Cuz if so, I have a bridge in Brooklyn you might want to take a look at.

Alrighty then, that’s about all my wee brain can come up with today. Feel free to add to the list.